名人名言 - 21-01-2016_120001

No. 0. Quote:
For there are moments when one can neither think nor feel. And if one can
neither think nor feel, she thought, where is one?
-- Virginia Woolf, "To the Lighthouse"

[Quoted in "VMS Internals and Data Structures", V4.4, when
referring to powerfail recovery.]

No. 1. Quote:
October 12, the Discovery.

It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss
it.
-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"

No. 2. Quote:
Q: Why don't lawyers go to the beach?
A: The cats keep trying to bury them.

No. 3. Quote:
Accent on helpful side of your nature. Drain the moat.

No. 4. Quote:
You will step on the night soil of many countries.

No. 5. Quote:
question = ( to ) ? be : ! be;
-- Wm. Shakespeare

No. 6. Quote:
The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first
half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and
pleasant, the second half still balmy and quite pleasant for those who
hadn't heard the scream at all, but not calm or balmy or even very nice
for those who did hear the scream, discounting the little period of time
during the actual scream itself when your ears might have been hearing it
but your brain wasn't reacting yet to let you know.
-- Winning sentence, 1986 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.

No. 7. Quote:
Q: What is the difference between a duck?
A: One leg is both the same.

No. 8. Quote:
Today is what happened to yesterday.

No. 9. Quote:
Day of inquiry. You will be subpoenaed.

No. 10. Quote:
ROMEO: Courage, man; the hurt cannot be much.
MERCUTIO: No, 'tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide
as a church-door; but 'tis enough, 'twill serve.

No. 11. Quote:
You get along very well with everyone except animals and people.

No. 12. Quote:
Your heart is pure, and your mind clear, and your soul devout.

No. 13. Quote:
Q: What does a WASP Mom make for dinner?
A: A crisp salad, a hearty soup, a lovely entree, followed by
a delicious dessert.

No. 14. Quote:
Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to screw in the light bulb and two to fend off all those
Californians trying to share the experience.

No. 15. Quote:
That secret you've been guarding, isn't.

No. 16. Quote:
Your object is to save the world, while still leading a pleasant life.

No. 17. Quote:
Q: How many Harvard MBA's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one. He grasps it firmly and the universe revolves around him.

No. 18. Quote:
Even the clearest and most perfect circumstantial evidence is likely to be at
fault, after all, and therefore ought to be received with great caution. Take
the case of any pencil, sharpened by any woman; if you have witnesses, you will
find she did it with a knife; but if you take simply the aspect of the pencil,
you will say that she did it with her teeth.
-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"

No. 19. Quote:
Q: How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to assure everyone that everything possible is being
done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.

No. 20. Quote:
You're almost as happy as you think you are.

No. 21. Quote:
Fine day to work off excess energy. Steal something heavy.

No. 22. Quote:
Tempt not a desperate man.
-- William Shakespeare, "Romeo and Juliet"

No. 23. Quote:
By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.
-- Mark Twain

No. 24. Quote:
You will be singled out for promotion in your work.